"Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use a honeycomb."
"How did the student feel when he learned about electricity? Totally shocked"
"Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I'm not going to spread it"
"Where do you find a turkey with no legs? Where you left it."
"Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you do criticize them, you're a mile away, and you have their shoes."
"Evening news is where they begin with “Good evening,” and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t."
"Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet? Because they could spend years at C."
"Why it is hard for a communist to tell a joke? It's not funny until everyone gets it."
"Why did the scarecrow get promoted? Because he was out standing in his field!"
"I smoke Internet"
"I smoke Internet"